Light of Darkness Page 11

  Something lightly hits me in the face, and my whole body starts to tingle. I’m hit again, and I get goosebumps. I’m suddenly jittery, my heart racing, like how it feels when three cups of coffee finally catch up you. It’s hard to stand still as this invisible wave continues to bombard me, so I start bouncing in place.

  “Tell me, Kyle. What are you feeling?”

  “Hyper,” I say a little louder and more forcefully than I was expecting.

  “That’s perfect.”

  “What’s going on? What keeps hitting me?”

  “What you’re feeling is energy. Both mine and that around us. You should be able to see it.” Shadow takes in another breath, then exhales forcefully. The area around him shimmers, like the waves of heat coming from the street in the summer. A bubble appears, radiating from him and expanding outward. Fluid lines of black, gold, and white shift on its surface before it hits me harder. My hair stands on end.

  “Do you see the boulder in the distance?”

  “Yeah, I see it.”

  “Keep your eye on it.”

  With one more exhale, he shifts his feet and vanishes. He appears out of nowhere in front of the boulder and drives his claw in deep within it. Black spikes explode out of the rock, turning it to dust.

  “Whoa, that’s what you did to me earlier, minus the spikes. What was that?”

  He relaxes with a slight shudder. “A product of the third stance. Now let’s get started; time is short, and this is the hardest to learn.”

  “How is time short?”

  “Don’t worry about it, just get into the stance.” He re-enters the stance. He looks back at me. “Well, come on.”

  Quickly, I get into Toralu. With a deep breath, I bring my hands up to the center of my chest, slowly bringing them together. As the tips of my fingers meet, a chill runs through them, up my arms and down the length of my spine. My skin feels like thousands of bugs are crawling on it, and my muscles, my veins, and my blood are on fire. “Ah, this hurts. What is this I’m feeling?”

  “This is what it feels like to harness energy. The burning that you feel is it flowing through your very being, healing and strengthening you all at once.”

  “How did he come up with this?”

  Shadow shakes his head and then sighs. “Through grief. After a battle that claimed many of the lives of his brethren, he concluded that they were still lacking.”

  “Lacking in what?” I ask, breathing hard.

  “Of the understanding of one’s own power.”

  My stomach starts doing backflips, making me waver out of the stance a little.

  “Don’t be afraid, and don’t try to fight it. Embrace it. It also helps to breathe.” Slowly, Shadow inhales deeply and then exhales.

  I follow his breathing pattern. With every breath, the queasiness lessens, but the sensation of my skin crawling grows more intense. I take a deep breath, and as I exhale, the feeling starts to leave my skin, stretching outward into the air around me, as if the bugs that were crawling on me start to swarm, filling the air with the hum of their wings.

  Steadily, it grows, stretching farther out. Until it abruptly stops.

  “There you are,” Shadow says. “I feel your energy pushing against mine. You’re taking to the style quickly. I’m impressed.”

  “Thanks. Now what do I do?”

  Shadow relaxes out of the stance and stands up straight. “Can you move while maintaining that feeling, even a little?”

  I try and take my hands apart, but it’s like they are superglued together. I try to move my legs, but they are frozen. As a matter of fact, other than my face, my whole body feels stiff. “No,” I say, straining against myself.

  “Well then, you’re just going to have to sit there until you can.”

  “Why can’t I move?” I ask, still trying to.

  He moves his claws in a circular motion. At the tip of his fingers, two masses of liquid darkness swirl into existence, forming into balls as they float just above his palms. “Energy is hard to control, hard to contain. Kross’s ancestor knew this. So, as a way of teaching and testing if one had the ability to do such a thing, he created the third stance. He called it S’ka. It means ‘self.’”

  I try to rock myself to fall to the ground but…nothing. “How does that explain why I can’t move?” I ask, still struggling.

  “For those who know nothing of the flow of energy and try to channel it, their bodies cannot handle it and freeze under the strain.” The ball of black energy floating above his left claw starts to turn white, like ink being poured into water. “The white represents you and the energy that resides within you.” The white ball forms into a small version of me standing in this stance. “And the black is the energy that you’re trying to channel through your being.” He moves the black orb to the statuette. Slowly, it seeps into the white statuette, but not all the way; it stops, leaving a thin layer around the body. “This is what’s happening to you. This thin layer is constricting the flow of your own energy that allows you to move, and you’ll stay there until you can make that energy,” the thin layer seeps all the way into figure, and it turns completely white, “your own.”

  “Is there anything you can do to help?”

  The energy example vanishes like smoke in the wind, and he crosses his arms. “Nope. I’m going to sit here and watch you figure it out.”

  “Great.”

  “Oh, and no pressure,” he points toward the horizon behind him, “but you have until the sun sets.”

  I look up. From my peripheral, I can’t see the sun; it must still be kind of high. “What happens then?” I ask, looking back to Shadow.

  “You die,” he says seriously.

  “Wait, what?”

  “I didn’t stutter. You will die. Within the next few hours, the energy that you are channeling will convert yours into its own and then dissipate back into the surrounding area, leaving only a husk. So, get to it.”

  Some time passes as I try to force myself to move: my hands, my legs, and any other muscles I can think of. Nothing happens. “This is stupid! What is the point of this?”

  “Like I said: to help you understand the power within and how to control it.”

  “What is that supposed to even mean?!” I yell. I can’t think of anything that would help me out of this situation.

  For a few minutes, I watch the sky. The sun, now in my sights, slowly sinks toward the horizon. Damn, what am I supposed to do? My core tightens, like I’m trying to balance myself on a tightrope. I try to grip the ground with my toes, but I don’t feel them straining to do what I want them to. I don’t even feel my weight on my feet anymore.

  “It’s starting. I can see your energy beginning to seep out of you and into the air. From the confusion on your face, I’m sure you’ve already noticed that you can’t feel your feet. Most likely, you can’t feel your hands either.” I fight to clutch them into fists; I see the them shake, but like he said, I can’t feel them.

  “It starts with numbness in your outer extremities first. Soon, it’ll move in toward your core, and then you’ll feel cold. Thinking will become difficult, and breathing nearly impossible. You’ll feel panic and fear all at once, which will cause you to go into shock. Your heart will most likely seize during this time, and then, if you can’t figure it out, death.”

  If he’s trying to freak me out, then he’s doing an amazing job at it. I continue to strain, but still nothing. The feeling in my arms and legs starts to fade; the sensation of nothingness slowly creeps up them. Panic and fear set in hard as my eyes burn from the tears forming in them. What am I supposed to do? My heart starts racing, so fast that I can’t catch my breath. My vision gets hazy, and I can barely think. I look to Shadow, who is unfazed by my panic and frustration. His sapphire-blue eyes just focus on me. “Am I about to die?” I ask.

  He looks back over his shoulder at the sun, of which there is only a sliver left now, peeking over the horizon. Whoa, what!? It was just… How long have I been standin
g here? I—I have no time left. Panic unlike anything I’ve ever felt overwhelms me. This is it.

  I continue to struggle, but as if crashing from a sugar rush, all my energy is sapped away. It feels like I’m holding my breath, but if what he said is true, I’m not breathing anymore. My eyes grow heavy as the burning within my body turns cold. Everything begins to spin, and then it all goes dark.

  “Kyle,” a voice says in the distance. “Kyle,” it says even louder now, closer. “Kyle, can you hear me?” asks my own voice, a little worn and breathless. I open my mouth to say something, but I’m having a hard time finding the words. “Good. Open your eyes.”

  I do as I’m told, and there I am, bound in a tree, with long black hair and sunken eyes—my mind. “How?” I manage to ask through my confusion.

  He smiles a weary smile. “Look around you.”

  “I can’t move.”

  “Yes, you can.”

  I look down to my hands, that are still together in praying fashion. Slowly, I pull them apart. “Wait, I can move again?” I grip the ground with my toes. It’s loose, like sand, but the ground is supposed to be hard. “Where am I?”

  “This is The Crown, a place where the connection between the mind and the energies of the universe intertwine”

  “What? Wait, I thought I was dead?”

  He chuckles. “Almost.”

  “I’m confused.”

  “I know. Go and look out over the edge.”

  I turn and walk away from my mind. Carefully, I tread over the sand, trying to keep myself vertical since everything is still kind of numb. Farther away from the tree, the ground grows moist, as if there was water here at one point. At the edge of this sandbank, it drops off into a dark void. I peek out over the edge. Down below are other sand islands, floating in the nothing, each glowing a different color. The one right below me is indigo, followed by blue, green, yellow, orange, and lastly, red. I turn back to my mind. “Why...”

  “Are you here? To learn of power and control.” I glare at him, and he starts laughing. “Don’t worry, it’ll be quick. We don’t have much time to dawdle. Tell me, how do you feel?”

  I look at my hands, which are trembling. “Cold, tense, and scared.”

  “Well, we are on the verge of death, so it is natural that you feel that way, but in situations like this, you can’t hold on to those feelings. You have to let them go, because they’ll only impede you from surviving, from understanding.”

  “Understanding what?”

  “That the relationship between you, your power, and your energy is like that of the relationship between you, your friends, and your family.” The sand around me starts to shift and swirl, lifting into pillars. They harden, taking the form of people. The first to finish has an old, thin, athletic build, and I recognize her instantly as my aunt. The sand pours from the others as they take shape, turning into Rica, Page, and Airca. “You do not try to contain your loved ones, nor wield control over them. You allow them to be who they are, allow them to come and go at their leisure.”

  The statues all begin to circle me. They vanish in the wind and reappear, wearing different hairstyles and clothing. My aunt falls apart and then reforms differently, so different that I barely recognize her. Her walk is spryer, and her hair is way longer than I’ve ever seen it.

  Behind her, the sand starts to swirl, forming into another statue. It takes the shape of a woman that I’ve never seen before. Her hair is in a braid reaching all the way down her back to the ground, which is crazy because she’s tall—probably six feet or more. She’s kind of thin, but the confidence in her stride gives me the sense that she’s stronger than she seems. The woman places her hand on Serena’s shoulder before the both of them crumble. “Who was that?”

  “Someone you’ve forgotten—someone who has come and gone so many times that you can’t recall them, but they are always near, ready to lend their strength.” There’s a loud cracking noise, and the island starts to rumble. The sand statues fall apart returning to the sand. “Hell, we’re out of time, Kyle. I know this is hard to comprehend, even when I’m not talking to you, but you have to figure it out. Just remember, let it…come to…you.”

  As my mind slumps his head, everything comes rushing in. My head starts throbbing, like someone put a nail to it and started hammering away. But there’s no time to worry about it. “Okay, okay. Family, energy, my power? I don’t get it.” The ground opens under my feet, and I plummet into the void. The Crown vanishes, as if blown away by the wind. I flip over, and all the other sandbanks begin to disappear as well, leaving nothing but endless darkness. “Come on. Think, think, think.”

  The throbbing gets worse, throwing my train of thought off my current situation. I think about my aunt and one of her teas that obliterates headaches. She’s always there for me. A gust of wind hits me hard, flinging me to one side. My body tingles as the numbness is relieved and feeling returns. A warmth surges from my stomach and spreads throughout my body, just like how her tea would have made me feel.

  My heart starts to pump so hard that it takes my breath away. “My energy is like my aunt and the girls. They may change, but they’re always there, protecting me and keeping me going. Below me, in the distance, a small blue light appears, shining like a star. It flashes. A rumbling wave of sound rattles me, just before a massive whirlwind of heat and light hits and blinds me. I regain my senses, and it doesn’t feel as though I’m falling anymore, but floating.

  I open my eyes to a sky filled with the colors of the rainbow, shifting and swirling like oil in water. A massive, rushing fall of blue liquid pours from seemingly nothing into this endless sea.

  Something splashes in the sea next to me, getting on my right hand. I lift it, and a thick, white substance clings to it. What is this? The sky opens, and it starts to rain. Big droplets of white pour down over the expanse of the sea. It quickly turns white as its surface is covered. It reminds me of the energy example Shadow showed me.

  This is the energy from around me. The energy that I’m channeling.

  The rain stops. The white energy moves in my hand. It begins to take shape, turning into a long, slender arm and a delicate hand. I turn to the right to see the featureless face of the tall woman that had appeared in the sand rising from the sea.

  “I don’t know you, or rather I’ve forgotten you.”

  Starting from the tips off my fingers, my hand starts to become transparent. As it moves up my arm, it begins to glow blue like the sea surrounding us. “But you’re always there to lend me your power. So, come as you are, leave when you may. Just continue to be there when I need you.” It nods in agreement.

  I look back up at the sky and take a deep breath. Something gets caught in my throat, causing me to cough. As I try to catch my breath, I realize that I can’t breathe. Above me, the sky darkens, losing its colors all at once. The giant fall of blue shrinks down to a trickle and then disappears. What’s going on? I put my hand over my heart. It’s not beating. I’m still dying. Am I still missing something? I look to the woman. She’s just staring, waiting for something. I need to do something. “Can you help me?’

  She takes my hand in hers, interlacing our fingers. Within my arm, veins appear, filling with the white energy of her being. My whole body begins to absorb more of the energy surrounding me. A current takes me, pulling me down into the dark depths of the sea. A surge of power fills my muscles, and my heart jump-starts hard again.

  I open my eyes wide and suck in a breath. My heart jolts back to life as the energy surrounding me starts to shift, making my skin crawl as I feel it well up within me. Rocks and debris pick up off the ground, carried by the dense, swirling energy. With all my strength, I pry my hands apart and break out of the stance. A scream—no, a roar— leaves my mouth, holding all of the fear and relief I feel. The bubble of blue energy that has surrounded me explodes outward. Shadow braces himself, but he is still pushed back feet away from me.

  I fall to all fours, dizzy. “I’m alive,” I
say, breathing hard. “Thank God.”

  Shadow’s feet appear in my line of sight as he walks up to me. “Well done, Kyle.”

  Tears stream down my face as I look up at him. I try to relax, but it’s not working; I’m too scared, too frustrated, too angry. “You were just going to let me die.”

  “To achieve something so profound, you must first be willing to risk everything.”

  I look at him, confused. “But my life though? Isn’t that risking yours too?” He nods. I wipe my face in disbelief. “And what did I even achieve? What was the point of all this?”

  “What you achieved is an understanding of energy. Also…” he points behind me.

  I look back over my shoulder to…the tree? Its branches are filled with leaves; the vibrant colors of the rainbow peek through them. Apples, pears, grapes, pomegranates, and, I think, figs all hang, scattered throughout the plumes of leaves. Most are bright, ripe, and ready to pick, but there are a few that are bruised and little too ripe. The trunk is untwisted, full and strong. The bark, still ashen white, is now tight and healthy. The most shocking thing about the scene is my mind. He sits on the ground before the tree, crossed-legged, no longer bound. A small, content smile sits on his face. “What?” I ask, looking back to Shadow.

  “You’ve also achieved peace of mind.” He puts his claw on my shoulder. “Now stand; we’re not done yet.”

  I slap his claw away and stand, getting into his face. “How could you put me through that?” I ask in quiet rage.

  He looks at his claw, then back to me. I’m so scared that my teeth chatter a bit, but I’m too angry at him to back down. He sighs. “I know how frightening it is, Kyle.

  “Do you really?” I ask sarcastically.

  “You forget. I was Kross. When he was young, he went through it too.” I did forget that. ”Kyle, not many have to go through this, and of those that do, not many survive. It takes a different kind of strength complete this, and it gives you a better understanding of yourself and of your power.”